Having a mental illness can make you feel guilty for having it. It can make you think: “Let me grab my laptop in the middle of the night to write this down”, because who knows when I’ll have enough energy or even a sound mind to think while writing.
Having a mental illness can make you confused about what the extent of it can be. You wake up and have severe migraine and anxiety fever for that entire day. You start introspecting, contemplating, and eventually come to the realization that it happened because of previous hard days of high levels of anxiety. And then you start to think if this is it. Is my body telling me how sick in the head I am? It might sound way-way-way more funnier than it is.
But it is true. You can try to ignore it, deny the signs and symptoms, but, eventually your body will tell you.
Oblivion is bliss.
Not so much when your body starts to deteriorate because of the war you’re constantly fighting with your mind.
You are alone. You are always alone, no matter what. No matter how many good friends you have or however much supportive your family is. In life, YOU have to tackle everything you go through. Sadly true. You have to take care of yourself, your mind, and your body.
I hope resilience is a good thing for you, and not just something that you train yourself to have after understanding that you indeed have no support in your life.
You can’t pour from an empty cup.
It is indeed melancholic. To pour into someone else’s cup, yours should be full, and sadly, it will be full of your trauma and resilience that you’ll disguise as “experiences” and store.
Mental illnesses are never just psychological. And all of us have some or the other stresses that ruin our mental health. Because as our elders say,
“This is life. Deal with it to go further.”
– Avni Verma